I am nearly halfway through my journey towards my third birth! I thought I would check in and let share a bit about my journey so far … which has been blissfully uneventful.
No excessive exhuastion.
I was also beginning to suspect that there may also be no baby … apart from the growing belly and the little flutterings from within. My first pregnancy was like this – but at 16 weeks I was still not showing and not feeling anything, and in a crazy moment of doubt I called out to the baby within: “Do SOMETHING!”. And within the hour I felt my first bout of nausea (and I was glad I had not felt that regularly!)
But this time it has been very obvious to everyone about what is going on, from even about 4 weeks, and even still I was entertaining other reasons why my waistline might be expanding. Yes, silly, I know 🙂
I have, however, had my first appointment with my midwife, and now I know FOR SURE there is indeed a little bubba swimming around in there, with a little racing heartbeat and an energetic disposition 🙂 It made all the difference to me, finally having this meeting with my midwife, it really did.
I have no experience with hospital midwives at all, so I have nothing to compare my experience to. The only people I have spoken to in hospitals are obstetricians, and I can tell you for sure that they don’t have the TIME to spend with a client to do the things my midwife does. Plenty of time to offer opinions, however … but then as a serial home-birther I have given these obstetricians plenty to offer their opinions about.
But that is another story, and not one I have entered into yet, with this pregnancy.
At my appointment, after the usual pregnancy health checks, my midwife took a moment to talk to me about how I FEEL about this baby and this pregnancy. It was lovely to hear from her that my feelings about this journey match up with other third-time mothers and fathers – I tried to explain it this way:
The first baby brings the reaction: “Yay! WE ARE HAVING A BABY!!!!”
The second baby brings the reaction: “Oh how sweet, we are having another baby!”
The third one goes a bit like this: “OK … so, we are having another baby …”
Not sure how that translated into text but the implication is that the third child brings with it decisions, and compensations, and complications and considerations … all of which have gone through my mind, come out unanswered, and filed away as “we’ll just have to wait and see what happens”. So while I am not as THRILLED as I was when I found out Kaelan was on his way, or as WONDER-FILLED as I was when Rosella began her journey, I am HAPPY that this one is here, I am EXCITED about who he or she might be, and I can’t wait for July, to see what kind of birth this one will have. Hopefully not as long as Kaelan’s or as wild as Rosella’s!
My midwife also led me through a lovely relaxation, which was a dangerous exercise, given that it was after 6pm and at this point in time I usually fall alseep if I sit still for more than 10 minutes. There was some beautiful music playing, that reminded me of a pond. I was picturing still waters, but baby (still excited from the unexpected prodding of my midwife’s fingers moments before, and the chase to hear its heart beat) was jumping and wriggling about, and with each movement, large ripples disturbed my still pond … and I ended up giggling to myself through the meditation.
All the same, I appreciated the TIME to spend connecting with the baby – life with two children is busy enough, that we don’t have much opportunity to bond, but now that I have had a REAL experience of who is in there, it is much easier to take a moment and say hello to #3.
I was also given some books to read – my midwife has been with me through both my births, and has always kept me as informed as possible about the ways and means of birthing, the choices I have available to me, the knowledge about how my body works, how the baby grows … so much MORE than I ever expected. Both David and I have been grateful for the opportunity to LEARN about birth in ALL its aspects through our midwife.
I can’t imagine what it must be like for women who see a different midwife with each check-up! I wouldn’t do it any other way.