It rained again today.
With most of Queensland under water I am so very grateful that we are not experiencing floods, and I am not complaining about the rain, however the children really have reached the point where inside or verandah play just isn’t cutting it any more. So this morning the kids put on their swimmers and we headed to the Pirate Park at Palm Beach for a play. Sure enough it pelted down with rain, hard rain! But the kids had their hats on to keep the rain out of their eyes, and they were in their togs so didn’t mind getting wet and they were very happy. The rain stopped and was followed by great gusts of wind, so much that I had to wrap Linden up so tight and put away my umbrella … and then out came the sun.
With the kids happily bounding about the park and Linden asleep in the Ergo I sat down to do some writing in my notebook. Who knows why certain thoughts come to you at completely unrelated moments? Today I wrote about birth again, particularly my cesarean experience, and I don’t know if it was Linden’s or Kaelan’s or both, but here are the words that took advantage of the moment to visit me:
It wasn’t what I thought would happen when I imagined your arrival.
I thought it would be a moment of glory rather than a matter of survival.
I knew enough to know that I didn’t know what to expect,
But still I had my ideas for a birth that was perfect.
So with tears I took the needles and my sensations slipped away.
Your daddy held and kissed me and I began to pray.
What a relief it was when at last you were lifted out,
Your daddy and I were crying and you gave a hearty shout.
You were wrapped up so tight I could only see your face,
But Daddy took the blanket off and then we three embraced.
I’m truly very grateful for those who helped you in your birth.
Despite some differing opinions, all involved showed their worth.
There may always be a part of me, though selfish I must say,
That will always be left wondering why it had to be this way.
I know your birth was part your choice, part others’, Dad’s and mine.
We are all co-creators and I will accept that idea in time.
Here you are so perfect, and of course I should have guessed,
You’d remind me
that every birth
is a mother blessed