A Mother Blessed

It rained again today.

With most of Queensland under water I am so very grateful that we are not experiencing floods, and I am not complaining about the rain, however the children really have reached the point where inside or verandah play just isn’t cutting it any more. So this morning the kids put on their swimmers and we headed to the Pirate Park at Palm Beach for a play. Sure enough it pelted down with rain, hard rain! But the kids had their hats on to keep the rain out of their eyes, and they were in their togs so didn’t mind getting wet and they were very happy. The rain stopped and was followed by great gusts of wind, so much that I had to wrap Linden up so tight and put away my umbrella … and then out came the sun.

With the kids happily bounding about the park and Linden asleep in the Ergo I sat down to do some writing in my notebook. Who knows why certain thoughts come to you at completely unrelated moments? Today I wrote about birth again, particularly my cesarean experience, and I don’t know if it was Linden’s or Kaelan’s or both, but here are the words that took advantage of the moment to visit me:

 

It wasn’t what I thought would happen when I imagined your arrival.

I thought it would be a moment of glory rather than a matter of survival.

I knew enough to know that I didn’t know what to expect,

But still I had my ideas for a birth that was perfect.

So with tears I took the needles and my sensations slipped away.

Your daddy held and kissed me and I began to pray.

What a relief it was when at last you were lifted out,

Your daddy and I were crying and you gave a hearty shout.

You were wrapped up so tight I could only see your face,

But Daddy took the blanket off and then we three embraced.

 

I’m truly very grateful for those who helped you in your birth.

Despite some differing opinions, all involved showed their worth.

There may always be a part of me, though selfish I must say,

That will always be left wondering why it had to be this way.

I know your birth was part your choice, part others’, Dad’s and mine.

We are all co-creators and I will accept that idea in time.

Here you are so perfect, and of course I should have guessed,

You’d remind me

that every birth

is a mother blessed

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7 thoughts on “A Mother Blessed

  1. Brought tears, Jen. I’ve never considered that Sophie’s arrival could have been part her choice. I’ve always thought of her as being taken from me as mine and other’s choices, but not hers, so thank you for your words, as I contemplate what that means for me.
    xo

  2. Hi Chelsea, I’ve always thought that our babies have had a say in the way they are born. If it was all down to me things would have unfolded very differently!! All three of my births would have been calm, meditative experiences if it were up to me 🙂 Who knows why Rosella shot out like a cannon ball – Miss Independent from the moment of birth. Who knows why Kaelan corkscrewed and wedged himself in there, and who knows why Linden went into distress but was born perfectly happy and healthy? I’m pretty sure Linden broke her waters by herself to get the hell out of there!

  3. Are you trying to make me cry over here, Jennifer?? Wow. I haven’t thought about my C-section with Isabel for a long while. But all of the emotion and disappointment and wondering flooded back when I read your words. We are so blessed that our little ones made it safely into the world. The need for the intervention is a mystery as it seems birth is such a natural event but I know without it neither she or I would be here today. Thank you for expressing my heartfelt feelings exactly.

  4. Pingback: moment to moment mothering « an open heart

  5. Pingback: Lavendilly Story Time: The Ringing Bell | lavendilly

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